I've been having a series of disembodiment and dissociation dreams lately, but they can’t be considered escapades. In fact, I can't "run away" to anywhere specific, it's simply different kinds of voids and "placeless” spaces that I get stuck in. I usually wake up filled with dread and with a low-grade anxiety that follows me through the day. At this point, my subconscious has built a fairly detailed hellscape (demonic whisperings in Aramaic; possessions; black holes; distorted runaway laws of physics, etc.) that I truly have a full menu of nightmarish triggers to choose from every night.
Existential anxiety: It wasn't until I watched a science doc about how our universe would end that I started to understand what the voids in my dreams were – it’s an unimaginably distant post(10^10 trillion … ∞)-apocalyptic future, where our bodies and the world as we know it have ceased to exist, but the universe and entropy relentlessly continued, until time itself has reached its natural conclusion. In my dreams, I have never seen a void collapse back into some kind of "primordial atom" (like in a "Big Crunch" scenario). But interestingly enough, the voids all “feel" different – some are expectant, full of pent up energy, as if waiting for an excuse to explode. Others feel dark, full of fear, pain, and death; a resigned and exhausted end after eons of interminable suffering. Most often they just want to show me the moment I disappear and how inconsequential my existence is: in some kind of “Phase Transition” scenario the universe resets itself and within a few minutes all the atoms in the cosmos are rearranged, wiping out the fact of our existence forever, and none of us even knew it happened.
“Within the universe are the seeds of our own destruction" physicist Michio Kaku said matter of factly through my computer screen one restless night, and it’s becoming more prescient by the day. One of these nights, I’d like to have a flying dream, I haven't had one in a very, very long time …